Fourteen months ago I thought I was moving to Haiti for only a few months.
I sometimes wonder if I had known ahead of time that I was going to be here for over a year if I still would have “given God my yes!”
I sometimes wonder if I had known everything that was going to take place over this year if I still would have come.
I sometimes wonder if I really have what it takes to do this for the long haul.
Sometimes God doesn’t show us His plans for us all at once.
He didn’t tell the disciples everything. When Jesus led the disciples over the mountain to go and preach he didn’t tell them there was going to be a crowd of 5,000 people on the other side. He didn’t tell them they were going to have to feed the 5,000 people with only five loaves of bread and some fish.
Jesus knew there was going to be a lot of people there. He is God. He is not surprised by anything. But Jesus also probably knew that if the disciples knew what was ahead they might not have come. I wouldn’t have gone. I don’t like crowds. But, I would have missed the miracle.
I laugh when I think back to that girl who thought she knew what God had planned for her and her life. I still don’t know everything, but I understand more now about why God only shows us a little bit at a time about the mystery of what He has planned in advance for us.
We live in a culture today that is saturated with information and the world’s entire needs and wants. Because of this people are tired, depressed, and scared.
If God showed me everything at once I would be way too overwhelmed and would give up. This is not because of anything bad that happened in Haiti. Although if I had known about the predator size spiders…anyways, I would have given up because of my own self-doubt and fear of not being enough.
Life is basically one change after the other. One thing that doesn’t change, however, is God. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow.
I didn’t feed 5,000 people in Haiti with a few loaves of bread and some fish. But He did lead me to a country where I would witness the miracle of seeing Him work in ways I didn’t expect. Ways that would change how I view God and the plans he has for my life. Ways that I might have missed because of fear.
The new finance person arrived in Haiti mid-July. I have spent the last month training her. In less than a week I will be leaving Haiti to begin my move to the Dominican Republic.
Every transition in life comes with a crazy ride of emotions. Letting go of one season in my life and entering into another can be an emotional roller coaster of sadness, excitement, and adrenaline.
Haiti changes my story. My heart will forever be connected here. It has been a place I have learned to trust God in different ways. A place where I have seen different dimensions of Him and what He can do. A place that has become home with people I call family. A place that has better prepared me for what God has planned for me in the Dominican Republic.
Over the next several months I will be home in North Carolina visiting friends and family, attending a 3 day Trauma Competent Care training in Cincinnati, and going to Spanish language school in Costa Rica (beginning on September 1st.) I hope to be in the DR by early 2020.
Haiti has also taught me just how important language is to be sustainable, functional and effective. Please pray that God gives me the gift of language while I am in school.
Thanks for sharing this journey with me, and being a part of what God is doing in me and through me here on this beautiful island. I am looking forward to the plans God has already prepared in advance for us.
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” ~Ephesians 2:10
N’a wè byento Ayiti [see you soon Haiti]
One thought on “you don’t know until you go”
Awe love this!!! So happy for you and excited to shear all that God Has done through you!!!!